Long Distance Relationship Jealousy

As is sometimes the case, I am the lone dissenting voice here.

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I have been in a long distance relationship on and off for the past two years

(emphasis MINE) It would appear that you two have had problems for a while.

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...relationships are everything to get ahead.

I lived in Southern California, I feel you, bro!

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She has been having trouble with my relationship with some of my female friends that I have out here, and basically female friends that I have in general.

(again, emphasis MINE) You two are not married, you're not even engaged, but SHE has problems with your FEMALE friends. SHE wants to dictate with whom you can or cannot hang out; don't expect this to change EVER...whether married or single with this woman!

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She's got her reasons to be distrusting from past relationships

See, RIGHT THERE is the rub! You're paying for the sins of someone else. SHE has trust issues and takes it out on you EVEN THOUGH SHE KNOWS that you're NOT the one who cheated on her.

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I'm open and transparent and let her know exactly what i'm doing ...She says I need to find an "appropriate movie going friend".

No matter how transparent you are, nothing will change because YOU'RE not the problem...SHE has a problem and SHE'S NOT ADDRESSING IT. She wants you to behave in a way that is (a) not true to your nature

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I know what my boundaries are and they don't sync up. She's more strict and I'm more lax.

and is (b) going to make HER feel better. Uh, SHE needs to make HERSELF feel better! SHE needs to address HER insecurities and previous cheated-on relationships! SHE needs to address WHY she thinks a guy who is open and transparent and has never cheated on her DESERVES to be treated as though he HAS cheated on her...or is just about to!

I'm old enough to be your Mom (grandmom?) so take this advice that took me TOO LONG to figure out. Just because you LOVE someone does NOT MEAN you can make it work out long-term. You'll love a lot of people in your life (friends & lovers), but very few of them are built for the long-haul.

I just don't think this relationship is the right one for the two of you. I think a woman with as many insecurities as she has (with or without reason, not making a judgement) should NOT be in a long-distance relationship. I think YOU need to be with someone who is more open and trusting like yourself; it will make your life a LOT smoother.

Good luck!

Source: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/general-relationship-discussion/55815-long-distance-relationship-jealousy.html

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